March Adoptive Fam:: The Zimmer Fam

Hello friends!!! We are Andrew & Casey Zimmer. We most recently welcomed our son Jude this past February!!! We are overjoyed that we were chosen to share our journey to parenthood with you.  Please read on.

Andrew and I met as freshman in college and began dating in 2007. We were married in 2011 right after graduating. While were dating, we had discussed our mutual desire to have children.  This included having children naturally as well as traditional adoption. We shared a love to be parents and always felt this calling.

[We are engaged October 2010]

 

[Wedded bliss, marrying my best friend June 2011]

In my mind I would get through grad school, Andrew would be working at a good job, we’d buy a house, I’d work for a year, and we would start having kids after that.  I had it all figured out, seemingly.  

Proverbs 19:21 says “Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand.”

Andrew had a difficult time finding work while I completed grad school to be a speech-language pathologist. He had a communications degree, making it unclear what he was qualified for.  As my graduation approached, Andrew investigated Master’s programs in hopes of having better success with finding stable work.  I graduated May 2013 and we moved to Boone, NC about 2 months later. So we packed our things, and tearfully said goodbye, and moved 8 hours away.  This was scary and exciting at the same time since we knew no one and would be near more of God’s beautiful creation. I had not secured a job before the move.  We quickly found it difficult for me to find work due to the location and differences in state licensure laws. The pressure was on for me to find work, due to still having to complete a 9-month fellowship.  I prayed and happened to job search in my hometown of Columbus, IN. With no prospects in NC, I went for the interview and got the job. Against our better judgments, I moved back to Columbus, IN and stayed with my parents around March 2014.  

[Ahhh, living 30 minutes from the Blue Ridge Parkway was magical, North Carolina 2014]

After much prayer and hearing from God, it was time to start growing our family in May 2014.  We began trying to conceive naturally and estimated it would take a few months to get pregnant.  This was a difficult task considering we lived 8 hours away from each other.  I timed my ovulation and Andrew did a lot of driving. By June 2015, I began going to the OB/GYN to begin some preliminary testing since we had been trying to get pregnant for a year without any success.  I went through a battery of tests, which indicated no contraindications to my fertility health. Now it was Andrew’s turn. He began with a few routine measures and quickly started going to an Urologist. The Urologist completed tests and found his sperm count and quality to be abnormally low.  He started medications. I started a new job at a hospital and we moved to Richmond, IN. Andrew continued to be unemployed following getting his Master’s degree. After being on the medication for some time, tests were repeated and showed little improvements for Andrew’s fertility. Andrew underwent an invasive surgery in January 2016.  After a period of months healing, Andrew goes back on the same medication. He continues to be unemployed. We find our “church home.” We get involved in the young adult small group in March 2016, and finish the Sermon on the Mount study with them. Our next study is a marriage book by Francis Chan. This timing is perfect. We go to our first fertility doctor appointment in July 2016.  Things don’t look that great and the doctor cannot recommend IVF. He delivers this crushing blow: THERE IS LESS THAN A 1% CHANCE THAT YOU WILL HAVE BIOLOGICAL CHILDREN.  How do you swallow and process that?  Remember the “plan” we had early on?

Isaiah 43:2-3a “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you.  For I am the LORD your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.”

So, we had to have some options, right?  What about Sarah, Rebekah, Rachel, Hannah, Elizabeth, and other women in the Bible?  The Lord provided the way for them to have children, against all odds. What do we do?  Pray and trust that the Lord will grant us children in His timing.

We know that without a doubt that God can give us a biological child.  For now, God answered in a different way. The Lord laid adoption on our hearts.  

Romans 8:15 “For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, Abba Father!”

God adopted all of us and He is our forever family once we confess belief in Christ and turn from our sinful destruction.  Andrew and I quickly begin looking at the process of adoption. We knew adoption was expensive, but didn’t know it was that expensive.  We also come across embryo adoption during this time. Embryo adoption is where families who have gone through IVF have remaining embryos leftover.  They are done building their families and have decided to continue paying for them to be frozen. Families donate their embryos to adoption agencies and are a part of the selection process to help other families build their family.  Once you are matched with a family, the embryos are shipped to your fertility clinic. From there, the woman’s body is prepped with medication. When her cycle has been timed, the embryos are thawed and are inserted into her uterus. The frozen embryo transfer is an outpatient procedure.  The woman then goes home and waits 2 weeks to test for pregnancy. Though the woman carries the child, it is not biologically related to her. The beauty is that this soul is given a chance at life. It is essentially adoption from birth. There are hundreds of thousands of embryos waiting in freezers in the United States alone.  The decision for us came through lots of prayer, tears, and consideration of our finances. We moved forward with an embryo adoption agency in March 2017. Throughout this process, we were very private about our infertility journey. Only a handful of people knew about our struggles.

The paperwork flood begins.  After 10 months of part time work and continued job searching, Andrew started a job at a university in March 2017.  This was a huge answer to prayer. We were now both working full-time, which further demonstrated God’s faithfulness.  

The embryo adoption process is very similar to traditional adoption.  There’s a ton of paperwork, a home study, and it’s very invasive. It often left me bitter and resentful.  No prospective parents had to go through this to deem whether they were fit to be parents. God reminded me over and over again of His goodness. By mid June our home study was completed.  All of our paperwork, reports, and profile books were sent off in July 2017 by God’s grace. We began being much more transparent with our faith family about our infertility journey during this time.  So many people have since come forward with their own stories or shared about families who have been blessed through adoption. We experienced sacred moments of prayer, laying of hands, and an outpouring of love. Our faith family certainly surrounded us and ministered to us during this time.

[Getting creative with our announcement]

By January 2018 we completed the matching phase of our adoption.  We are now the proud owners of 10 embryos thanks to a generous family.  

[Awaiting frozen embryo transfer May 2018]

I eventually started medications to prepare my body, which took roughly 2.5 months.  The procedure itself has a 40% success rate. Our fertility clinic has a policy where they only insert 1 embryo at a time for the procedure.  In late May, I go in for the frozen embryo transfer procedure. One embryo is thawed, looks great, and is transferred. We go home and try to relax.  On June 1st, we receive THE PHONE CALL; blood work confirms it, WE ARE PREGNANT!!!!!

[Our little blastocyst- roughly 5-6 days old]

 

 

[Announcing our pregnancy joy!]

 

[Freezing for maternity photos. We can’t wait to meet you and figure out if you are a boy or girl]

 

[Welcome to the world Jude, the little embryo that could, our miracle boy]

 

[We love you so much! You will never know how loved for and prayed over you have been throughout this process. GOD IS GOOD ALL THE TIME]

We are still pinching ourselves and cannot believe our little man is here.  This boy is fearfully, wonderfully, and beautifully made by God. He has brought so much joy and love to our little family.  His timing is best. We welcome any and all questions you may have concerning embryo adoption. Adoption from birth rocks!!!!!!

Thank you for reading!!! We appreciate all your support!!!!!!

Love,

The Zimmer Family

PS. head over to Instagram to follow along on all our fundraising adventures this month!

 

February Adoptive Family:: The Fazenbaker Family

Hey, y’all! We are Kelley and Nathaniel Fazenbaker. We are so excited and thankful to be able to share our story. Thank you for following along!

After being married for a couple of years, Nate and I decided in September 2015 we were ready to grow our family. We both knew it could potentially take up to a year for things to happen, so we tried our best to just see where the year would take us and enjoy what could probably be the last several months with just the two of us. We both always dreamed of being parents, and after having several conversations about it, we realized we both feared that we may not be able to. Throughout 2016, we grew closer through our excitement, frustrations, and disappointment. God was preparing us for something even bigger than we could imagine…

In January 2017, while waiting on test results, we began discussing adoption. Even though it had been placed on my heart and had been something I was looking into more and more, Nate was the first one to say, “Maybe this is what we’re meant to do. If we are unable to have biological children, we can become parents through adoption.” Goodness gracious, I could have squeezed him to pieces in that moment! We decided to move forward with our adoption journey before receiving our final test results, knowing we may potentially revisit fertility treatments in the future.

We signed on with Christian Adoption Consultants and began working with our amazing consultant, Leah, on February 1, 2017. Later that month, we received the devastating news that biological children would not be a possibility for us. However, we had such an overwhelming peace about growing our family through adoption, so we dove into completing our home study and became active in May 2017.

Although our wait has been pretty long so far, I truly believe God has done amazing things through it. We made the choice to grow our relationship with each other and with Christ. We joined a wonderful church family a couple of months after going active, and they have been a huge support for us! However, I began struggling with severe anxiety and depression in the fall of 2017. It was a very hard season for me as the weight of everything began hitting me. It seemed like everyone around me was becoming pregnant and growing their families left and right, even accidentally. Those moments were so hard for me and while I had faith that God was in control of our story, I became very frustrated. It took a few deep conversations with friends and some courage to find the help I needed to push through it. That’s not to say I am completely healed from it or overcame those feelings, because there are many days I still struggle. But I believe God has worked on us so much these past two years, and because of it, we will be better parents than we ever would have been before.

We are incredibly thankful for this journey and this community. Our family and friends have been so loving and supportive, and I have met some of my closest friends through the online adoption community. I can lean on them, vent to them, and trust them with all of my thoughts and feelings. We pray for each other constantly. We are so anxious and excited to meet and love the expectant parents and children God has chosen for our family.

Again, thank you for following along, and we appreciate your prayers and support!

Love,

The Fazenbaker Family

PS. remember all the fun is happening over on Instagram!

January Adoptive Family:: The Warren Family

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November Adoptive Family:: The Douglas Family

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October Adoptive Family :: The Sorenson Family

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September Adoptive Family :: The Houk Family

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June Adoptive Fam :: Christopher & Kelsey

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May Adoptive Family :: The Exsted Fam!

We are Mike and Cassandra. We live in the Midwest, along with our three biological children. This year, we are celebrating ten years of marriage! Five years ago, if you were flipping through the pages of my Bible, you would land on a page, where … [Continue reading]