how to love a waiting mama

Mother’s Day has looked different for me every single year for the past nine years. At the beginning of our marriage, there were thoughts of one day having little ones making me homemade gifts with *mommy* written in their precious little handwriting. As we approached year five and still no little loves to call ours, my heart was torn and broken in so many ways.

I was alone…isolated…desperate and dreaded the weeks/days leading up to the day. I did not want to be around anyone on this day + I did not want people to tell me *happy mother’s day* ASSUMING I was a mother + I did not want to look at social media to see all the mamas with their babies. It was all too much.

I want to challenge you {really everyone} to be careful of your words and be so-full-of-grace leading up to Mother’s Day and especially on Mother’s Day. It isn’t a happy day for everyone.

I want to list a few things to think about and then I have a challenge to those of you who I have mama in waiting in your mind right now…

  • let her stay at home give her the space to do so. do not push her to go to church or to lunch or really anywhere. it will just make her heart hurt more.
  • she needs grace. so much grace on this day. I have found that the best thing to do is say *I love you and I am here for you.*
  • lower your expectations of waiting mamas. do not put any of your expectations on her to do or be or act a certain way.
  • her feelings are real. her wanting and desiring a baby that isn’t in her arms is the most real thing to her. she longs to hold that sweet love so badly it hurts sometimes so badly that she doesn’t even want to get out of bed.
  • if you have a close friend/family member that IS a mother but her babies are in heaven… she is still a mother. however you feel lead, tell her Happy Mother’s Day. she is a mother. {in my opinion, the best and most non-invasive way is a simple text.}
  • so to sum it up: waiting mothers need to be affirmed, acknowledged and celebrated on Mother’s Day.

now for the FUN part! I have two ways I want to celebrate waiting mothers.

1)) I am going to be hosting a giveaway for waiting mamas on my Instagram feed this weekend. I am asking you either ARE a waiting mama or you WILL send the gifts TO a waiting mama. So please consider entering!

2)) oh I’m so excited about this. I am going to share links to donate/purchase items in support of adoptions. You will be making it possible for a waiting mama to be ONE step closer to bringing her baby HOME. here are the links! YAY!!

Mullaly Family Adoption

Baby Vargas Adoption

The Guntlisbergen Family Love Story

Salinas Family Adoption Journey 

Schaaps Adopt

Green Family 

Adopting our daughter from India

Matthew and Megan Adopt 

Cooper Family Adoption

so much love to each of you! please let me know if you are going to join us over on Instagram or if you are going to support one of the waiting mamas above.

love,

KB

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